"The Passion is Raw but the Hot Dogs are Cooked"

With Independence Day comes fireworks, BBQs, parades, festivities, camping, and Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest at Coney Island, NY seen only on ESPN. Since 1916, people from 'round the world have been gathering to down as many hot dogs as they can in an allotted amount of time. Oddly becoming a viewing tradition in our home, the hot dog eating contest has never been more exciting than it was this year. Not really an avid fan of the "sport," I watch it for the commentary, because phrases like, "The passion is raw but the hot dogs are cooked," and, "He's just an all around great eater," only come out on the 4th of July.

Overheard at this year's contest:

• "That was the most exciting finish in all of sport."
• "These guys attack hot dogs like Lindsay Lohan attacks a mini bar."
• "'The Black Widow' is the cheesecake eating champion of the world. Let's see how she takes on the hot dogs."
• "This really is an endurance sport."
• "That last dog was a photo finish."
• "We have a tie to be settled by a five-dog eat off."

Lessons learned at this year's contest:

• This "sport" is actually called Competitive Eating
• There is an International Federation of Competitive Eating (IFOCE)
• The timed contest used to be 12 minutes, it's now only 10
• Dipping the bun in water makes it go down faster
• Those who qualify for the hot dog eating contest are generally world champions of some other food eating contest, namely, ice cream, cheesecake, cranberry sauce, and seared cow brains, to name a few
• Despite being a six-time hot dog eating champion of the world, coloring your hair with ketchup and mustard won't secure the win. Better luck next year my Japanese hot-dog-eating friend